Holy Mother of Moomin!

Moominmamma, Moominpappa, Moomintroll and Snorkmaiden

Without getting too much into how I feel about organised religion, I wanted to take a moment to address some of the points made on The Landover Baptist Church Forum, where a certain Alphonse Alban claims that the Moomins are one step away from being Satan’s concubine. My first response was of course, wtf?! Is he joking? On second glance, I realised that the sorry little bugger was serious and so I thought, blasphemy! Where do people come up with this nonsense?

Before I continue, I should clarify that I don’t know much about this site and don’t care to know more. I’m not a member of this forum and neither is my friend who pointed me to it. I thought it ironic that this Alphonse Alban character had a Moomin icon next to his name (among many others), which I thought meant he was a Moomin-lover but it somehow symbolises ‘ex-Scandinavian’. Erm…okay?

I’m not sure what happened to Alban to make him so bitter toward Tove Jannson and her work, but for someone who hates the Moomins he sure has spent a lot of time researching them and seems to know them well enough to put his own spin on what he thinks they represent.  Perhaps he had a falling out with Snorkmaiden and is jealous of Moomin? In any case, I think he’s a bit mental.

I strongly urge you to read his comical rundown of the inhabitants of Moominvalley. But it’s not just his absurd interpretation of the Moomins that bothers me. He also makes some references toward Japanese people and the tragic events of 11 March, as if to say their appreciation for Moomin contributed to the cause of the earthquake and tsunami:

“Recent display of God’s wrath upon Japan, may launch waves of illegal chink immigrants on your way. As they are from Japan, there is big risk that they have been infected by Moomins, and it is vital that you recognize the symptoms”.

There’s no point in arguing with a raving lunatic but come on, let’s not go there. However, if you must, at least get your racial slurs right. But what’s scarier is if you look at the responses, there are actually people that agree with him! Shudder.

It never ceases to amaze me how people can over-analyse the crap out of innocent children’s stories (i.e. Winnie-the-Pooh) and try to villainise the characters. I thought it fitting to leave you with my favourite quote from Mr. Alban, which highlights how deluded he is.

“So heed my warning. Stay way from Moomins! They have only been designed to lead children into damnation. If you ever come by ANY Moomin related material, you must burn it immediately, but use gloves before touching Moomin products. So great is the evil behind the Moomins that even short exposure can be harmful to your soul”.

What has this tormented soul taught me about my own beliefs, cultural heritage, and love for Moomin? Not much, to be honest. He gave me a good laugh and made me even more mad for Moomin. So to all Moomin fans, heed my words! Embrace your love for Moomins! If you ever get your hands on ANY Moomin related material, you must blog and tweet about it and share it with the world!

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10 thoughts on “Holy Mother of Moomin!

  1. As a friend of mine would say “Oh Dear God. In Heaven. Above”. The number of add-ons to the phrase signifies the degree of alarm. This is a triple, which is the maximum alarm that we have in the system at this time. Perhaps we need to add more… “Oh Dear God. In Heaven. Above. 24/7. With Moomins. Forever” Now, THAT would be alarming!

    You found an amazing corner of (to be very VERY kind) silliness. Thanks for sharing.

    Moomins Forever!

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